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June 5, 2007

Baseball needs to let its managers loosen up

It's been said that the clothes make the man, and I suspect the clothes are making the men who manage baseball teams crazy.

Consider two recent, well-publicized manager meltdowns, one by Lou Piniella, of the Chicago Cubs, and the other by Phillip Wellman, a minor league manager for the Braves.

wellman2.jpg Wellman
piniella2.jpg Piniella

Did you notice any similarities, aside from the red faces, bulging neck veins and dramatic flares?

Pot-bellied guys north of 40 just shouldn't be squeezed into tight-fitting baseball uniforms designed for 20-year-old centerfielders.

These guys have tough jobs and an even tougher dress code. Imagine sitting on a hard bench in tight pants all summer while your team squanders leads and umpires blow calls. The only surprise is that more of these guys don't end up crawling toward the pitchers mound like G.I. Joe and throwing rosin hand grenades.

(Watch video of Wellman's tantrum, which has been described as combining bits of Earl Weaver, Billy Martin and Piniella himself.)

Why does baseball do this to its managers? Other sports don't. Bill Belichick isn't forced to wear shoulder pads, a Patriots jersey and helmet on the sideline, although it might be an improvement over the rumpled look he normally displays.

Likewise Doc Rivers doesn't have to wear shorts on the Celtics sideline and the Bruins coach, whatever his name is, doesn't have to wear skates on the bench.

Most of these managers would probably prefer to watch baseball games as other middle-aged men do -- on a recliner in their boxer shorts. But that doesn't pay as well, unless maybe you have a radio talk-show gig.

The truth is, fans love watching managers snap like a 6-year-old. (It makes us feel like maybe our own kids aren't so bad.) And it's even more entertaining if these big kids look like they're going to burst out of their uniforms.

Posted by Jack Perry  at 3:21 PM | Permalink

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